First therapy appointment is heavy. There is just something about talking to a stranger about your life that stirs up a strange cocktail of excitement and dread. But, one thing people don’t realize is the therapist is busy not analyzing you. They’re busy doing what they do with all their other clients. It is far less exciting than what you build it up to be in your head.
The Boring Logistics Nobody Warned You About
It’s boring paperwork at the first appointment (except boring paperwork is still paperwork). There will be forms to sign and consent to share information, intake paperwork–some therapists will send you this ahead of time which eases the blow. Most appointments are 50 minutes to an hour long.
They may spend some time telling you about their therapy style, about therapy, confidentiality (there are exceptions they have to tell you about). It will feel awkward but it will go smoothly pretty quick.
Now you get to talk about why you are there (and what everyone dreads the most).
What Your Therapist Wants to Know
They are going to ask you questions. A lot of them, especially in the first session. It is not meant to feel awkward, but it is meant for them to get a full picture of you. What symptoms you are having, how long you have been experiencing symptoms, what is going on in your life, how you relate to people, where you are at in your work, your medical history and your family’s medical history.
Some therapists have a list of things to ask, and each client goes through these same questions while others have a more conversational bent. There is no right or wrong way to go.
Regardless if you are seeing a Denver therapist or going anywhere else, it is just about finding someone you click with and who does their therapy in a manner that works for you. This may take some time of going through different providers before you find your fit.
Asking about your medical history and your family’s medical history may feel intrusive but it really is used for treatment purposes.
You Don’t Have to Tell Them Everything
Here is one of the best parts, you don’t have to tell your therapist everything in the first meeting. Some people do and others take time to warm up before they want to share anything. Both are perfectly okay.
If there is something you are not ready to discuss make sure to say so. A half decent therapist is not going to shove you into depths that feels too thick for you to traverse but will gently nudge you if they feel there is something more that would help.
The opposite is also true if you want to dig deep into stuff right away, you can too. There are no rules about having to ease into therapy. After you have finished talking (which will probably feel like a lot for both of you) the therapist may spend some time towards the end recapping what you discussed. The therapist may offer suggestions on how to proceed.
This might look like a working diagnosis (though many will not share this until they have built more of a relationship with their clients), treatments and recommendations, frequency of visits. It is important to know if the therapist has a particular method they use and to ensure that the two of you are working together correctly (or if this is the right fit for you).
This might be a time to ask any logistical questions like, how long does therapy usually take? What process will they be using and how will progress be measured? What do you need to do before your next appointment?
If you decide to go forward in therapy with this therapist, this is when you will schedule your next appointment. And here is the part no one tells you about, saying no is perfectly okay! If it was awkward for whatever reason (and let’s face it, they usually are) just thank them and look for someone else.
There is most definitely a therapeutic alliance between therapists and clients that people need to know about when entering into counseling or therapy whether it be with a Denver therapist or a therapist near them.
Before You Go In: Actual Preparation That’s Helpful
Don’t walk into your first appointment overwhelmed by the idea of what to say. Instead of winging it, think of things you want to say.
It always helps to write things down on paper versus just thinking of it. You can write notes about issues you want to discuss or things going on that might have contributed. Some people even write down symptoms they feel are important for their therapists’ understanding.
Arrive 10 minutes early to fill out any paperwork they need for new clients. Bring your insurance information (if they take it) and the names of any medications you are currently taking. It is also helpful for therapists if you have had other therapy or mental health treatment in the past if you can tell them when and what types of treatments you received.
The biggest thing going into this first appointment is realistic expectations of not feeling better after one appointment. You might not even feel better after the first few sessions. The only thing that is necessary by the end is some understanding of whether this therapist can help and a general idea of how often you will need to come.
This first appointment is usually just an evaluation or an understanding and it takes a few appointments for therapists to develop an approach that fits the client or person who needs help. Most first appointments are awkward but remember, most important things are.